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June 30, 2008

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Di

I was driving 12 hours from Boca Raton to Raleigh last Friday, listening to NPR all the way. (No kids in the car with me, obviously...or it would have been rap and hip-hop and I would have purposely crashed the car before we crossed the Georgia state line.) I heard the inflatable bra story. It was so funny! I just loved that her Mom got her the bra to help her attract men!

HeatherErin

As a thirty *cough cough cough* woman, my OB/GYN offered me a mammogram. Now, I've had one already after finding a little something lumpy in the oatmeal, so I wasn't keen but I did accept it.

Until I had a thought. "I'm breastfeeding, will that be a problem?"

The response was priceless. "Well, the machine ain't waterproof. Call us when you're done."

Score.

However, as of next week, I will have been breastfeeding continuously for seven years. By the time I'm done I'll be able to unroll the girls for the nurse, let them be led into the other room, and I can still sit in the waiting room reading a magazine.

Just to make it worse, I got a bra fitting in Marks and Spencers once. The woman doing it laughed and then hushed herself. "What's so funny?" I said. She demurred. After convincing her I did have a sense of humor she finally said "Well, what you're looking for is a sheepdog bra." Huh? "Get 'em rounded up and pointed in the right direction."

Le sigh.

Sorry, I think I digressed. Blame the champagne.

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